“Rock Band Night” by Lindsey Rosin (Graham bangs on the table with his drum sticks) …I’m not saying we were blowing up or anything, but we were starting to make it happen. Getting traction, building a reputation. These things don’t happen overnight but it was starting to happen… and then, in the past couple of months everything’s just fallen apart because we had to fire our manager. I didn’t want to fire Jesse – he was the reason we’d been getting anywhere at all – but he really left us no choice cause he totally messed up and slept with Dan’s girlfriend. You know Dan right? The bassist? Tall, awkward… yeah, his skanky ass girlfriend went and slept with our manager while we were onstage at a show in San Diego. And then she got a “conscious” and had to come clean to Dan about it. And Dan made us fire Jesse. And Jesse apologized but it was messed up and it totally proves that, yeah, Jesse is a scumbag but now that we’ve dropped him we’re all unemployed and miserable. Or at least I am. Cause when we had a manager, he’d get us gigs all the time – but now we’re manager-less and gig-less and money-less and… now the music isn’t even fun anymore. It’s such a struggle. It’s like… work. I might as well have a frickin job. Uhh. (He bangs on the table a few more times) And now, Jesus, I didn’t even tell you the worst part. Now Dan’s got it in his head that we should go play a gig at the 8ball Wednesday night. Which would be cool if it were an actual concert we were playing… but it’s not… it’s just… Rockband night. Uhh it’s embarrassing to even say out loud, but you know the video game Rockband? With the drums and guitars and everything. Yeah… instead of having karaoke night on Wednesdays like they normally do the 8ball’s started having “Rockband night” where people can just sign up on a list and play a set on the video game or some shit… I think it’s the worst idea I’ve ever heard. That game is for people who can’t actually play instruments. But we CAN play real instruments. WE’RE A REAL FRICKIN ROCK BAND FOR GOD’S SAKE. I think it’s such a degradation of the art and the music… But Dan’s all “no, we gotta do it cause then we’ll get our fans back and then we’ll get a record deal blah blah blah”. Ya know who gets record deals? Musicians. People who play MUSIC. Not people who play video games… they get acne and carpel tunnel. But Dan keeps telling me I gotta “take one for the team”. I should remind him that his frickin’ girlfriend already took one for the frickin’ team and we lost our manager because of it. Am I wrong about this? It’s sex, drugs and ROCK AND ROLL right? Not sex, drugs and videos games… Jesus. (He bangs on the table a few more times)